Tuesday, February 10, 2009

A Grammy's not better than a damn...

Sunday night I was sick, nigh unto dying. Bereft of energy I collapsed onto the sofa, too weak to move even after I realized the Grammys were on. McCartney was singing I Saw Her Standing There with Dave Grohl on drums. Okay, not bad, although I speculated that Sir Paul was somehow sucking sustenance from these younger musicians he's always performing on awards shows with and that he might possibly live to be 150. My head was fogged so I may have these out of order but I remember: Justin Timberlake and TI performing Dead and Gone, with the kind of awful echo-vocal rapping that I hoped had gone away by now, followed by NARAS president (ie Grammy head honcho) Neil Portnow lodging his tongue firmly in Obama's rectum, saying that as a two-time Grammy winner BO should understand the need for a Secretary of the Arts. My condition began to worsen. The line about "Our finest national treasure is our culture and the arts." would have been more convincing had it not followed that gawdawful Justin/TI song. Somewhere in there was Radiohead (did I really hear Gwyneth Paltrow introduce them as 'the most influential band' or was that a fever dream? I've heard dozens of guitarists point to the Beatles on Ed Sullivan as their inspiration to start - and that was just one performance - so I don't think Radiohead's in it). Anyway they did some hideous song called 15 Steps -hopefully off a short pier - with the USC Marching Band that reminded me of previews of that Drumline movie. The tribute to the Four Tops was pretty good, and the Roll of the Dead was a can't miss of course, and then there's the Bo Diddley tribute... umm, we'll stick BB King and Buddy Guy out there, but our target audience doesn't give a crap about them, so we'll add renowned bluesman John Friggin' Mayer and toss in Keith Urban for the country crowd... nice. Anyways, somewhere in there I found the strength to move to bed and collapse there, where... the TV was shut off!!
Hey, while looking up who all those dorks were on the Grammys I found this blog with lotsa funny photo captions, it sure is funnier than mine!

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